Change

My readers, thank you so much for patiently reading while I sort through feeling some kind of way.

I realize that some of my feeling some kind of way has to do with preparations to end this school and start a new year. Yep, we are ending one school year and already making plans for next year.

The students are completely over school by now, and I get it, because I feel the exact same way. But, I continuously remind them and myself that "we don't stop when we get tired; we stop when we are finished."

I've been teaching ninth graders for five years, and it is time to do something different. So, I have made it known, every since around September, that I no longer wanted to teach ninth graders. I am willing to teach any other grade except ninth.

I fondly remember loving to teach 10th and 11th graders in previous schools sooooooo,

I found out that I would be teaching 10th and AP English 12 next year, and I am both excited and nervous at the same time.

I guess you are asking why excited and nervous?

Well, let me tell you, I am excited, because I love change, but nervous because change, when I do not know the outcome, scares the s@#* out of me. However, that nervousness typically does not stop me from moving forward. Moving forward without knowing the outcome is called faith, and I have a whole lot of that.

I've been teaching AP English 12th for three years, and I am more than good with that, but now instead of one AP class, I will be teaching two: double the work.... I never shy away from work, but I am nervous about all of those essays that I WILL grade. I will use every moment at work wisely, I do that now.... but, I am still a little nervous about the work load.

I have not taught 10th grade in the district where I currently teach EVER. I will need to read many, many, many novels this summer to determine which ones I will teach to my students, and I will also need to figure out what is important in the novels and think of strategies to convey the importance to my students. I'm excited but also nervous.

To be honest, I have gotten very comfortable in my current situation at my school, and who does not like being comfortable? But, sometimes, we must make a change in order to grow.

Next school year is also the year where I will have formal observations to make sure that I am still an awesome teacher, and I know that I will be great, but I am still a little nervous about teaching a new grade and getting evaluated. I will have to continuously tell myself, throughout the year, that I am a good teacher. (Yep, sometimes I still have self doubt about teaching, and I must replace the negative thoughts with positive thoughts!)

Now that I am getting to the root of feeling some kind of way, I sure am feeling better.

Thanks again for allowing me to sort through my feelings.....